humor · kids · motherhood · parenthood

an actual conversation

LILA: Don’t you want to hold my hand?

ME: Of course! I love to hold your little hand.

LILA: Do you love all the little parts of my hand, like all the little nails and everything?

ME: Yes! I love all your parts. Every freckle and every hair. I even love the parts that you might think are yucky.

LILA: Like what?

ME: Like… I even love your little sneezes.

LILA: You even love my boogers? And my snot?

ME: Um, you know those two are the same thing, right?

LILA: No they’re not. Boogers are what’s in your nose, and snot is what comes out of your nose.

ME: Huh. Okay.  (I honestly cannot explain what came over me at this point. If Boyd had said this to one of our children? Please.) You want to hear something really silly and kind of gross? Sometimes? If people blow their noses under water and something comes out? They call that a snot rocket.

LILA: Ew. Ew!

ME: I know! Isn’t that just SO gross?

LILA: Mommy?

ME: Yes.

LILA: If we were about to take a rocket, and there was a rocket there made of snot, I would definitely take a different rocket.


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